BlogYYY
Sunday, January 18, 2009,10:15 AM
had a bad day yesterday omg..my colleagues..really hopeless..and me..also hopeless..don't understand why i can let them bully me and i'll still remain silence. dun know what am i doing also..totally..no goals, no direction, no feeling..
today..luckily i got out of the house in evening with eileen they all..came back..heard that my dad quarrel with sis in law again..dad said she scold them even worse bad words such as ka ni na and chou ji bai..really dun know what to say..mum even say she want to die so that she can be free from all this suffering..recently she hasn't been stop bleeding in her nose..on thursday she's going for her checkup..she said that she wants a relapse from her cancer and just die away..no one will understand how am i feeling. these few days even though they know that she's not feeling well, they still continue to push triston to her to take care of him..if one day my mum really die, i'll go with her together..at least she won't be bored in her journey. and i'll definitely be back to haunt my brother and sis in law. unless my sipit is destroyed if not i'll definitely come haunt them everyday, every night, every min, every second. i wan them to pay for what they've did, i want them to suffer, i wan them to die.
and, amos, stop giving me excuses le, i'm really very tired. the best thing that i've done for you is that i didn't hate you after all that you've done to me and instead i wan to console and help you. this is the furthest i can go for you, i can't go on anymore, i'm very tired..very very very tired. i have my own problems too, dun come to me again when you have problems. and no matter what i become in future is not your business. if it's because of guilty or because of your dad ask you to get together with me again, sorry, its not possible for it to happen. if u do feel guilty then just take well care of her, if u don't love her anymore, just find someone else, not me. u're not the guy i'm looking for in my life, and, in my life, there won't be anyone entering my heart again. whenever i need you, you're not there at all, and only appears when the thing is solved..whenever you need me, i'm there for you to break your fall..why must it be this way everytime..sorry i can't take it anymore..so you can forget about all those excuses and nice sentences that you've to think to tell me. take care..bye.
