BlogYYY
Thursday, November 8, 2012,1:52 AM
8th Nov 12, 5.30pm
1 week plus away will be my 23th birthday, I seems to be worrier about my future. I just went through my O level's English exam, my goal was to obtain a pass so that I can upgrade myself in degree. However, last night I had a nightmare, dreamt that I didn't make it for the exam. It makes me reflect that what if I really didn't make it, should I still retake or just remain at my current state. I know most of the people around me are upgrading themselves to degree or even master, it makes me feel that if I don't upgrade, my future will be bleak.
Meanwhile, it may not be the truth. I've been searching for science courses this afternoon but the results are still the same as before. If I want to further study in pharmaceutical industry, among 2 schools, PSB will be a better one. It takes $43,000 and 4 years to complete the whole part time degree. Firstly, even if I complete the degree, I can't be a pharmacist. Furthermore, I know that my company is interested in promoting me to a higher level in 1 or 2 years time. If I were to change hospital, most probably will directly become a senior pharmacy technician after that, without the need of a degree, just relevant experience will do. Next, if so much money is to be spend in my studies, calculating the advantanges and disadvantages, I seemed to be at the losing end. No promotion after studying, money loss but however, I admit that I'm able to gain more knowledge.
I tried looking at other courses but was not interested in any of them. Suddenly, I feel that maybe I had chosen the wrong course or path after my graduation from secondary school. However, in life there's no turning back, I know that I have to make a decision somehow and not to regret it. Although I'm stuck with my course choices, but I still feel happy that I'm a pharmacy technician, maybe because I followed my interest and managed to secure a job from it. Sometimes, it is the truth that handling weird and demanading patients are very energy draining, but it also makes me feel happy when I see other patients recovering slowly from their illness.
Should I further upgrade through degree courses? Eileen told me to follow my heart, if I don't have the heart to do so, I shouldn't do it, so that I won't waste the money. I think the answer is in my heart, it's just that I'm doubting my judgement and prediction. Confused.
